I had someone ask me what happened to me way back to cause me to stop playing. The answer to that was kind of a combination of things. I guess it all started when I won a large tournament about 4 years ago. I felt link I had finally accomplished what I had been working so hard to do. I had always seen poker as a way to make a lot of money so that I could invest it in other things and make more money. I had never planned on playing poker for the rest of my life. I always looked at the people who were older and still playing as a pro. Most of them are miserable with few friends and no life. That’s not what I wanted. They also get stuck with no other skills and have no other options but to play poker.
So after I won the tournament I didn’t play any poker for a few months. Most people jump up in limits and try to play larger, not me. I wanted to enjoy life away from the poker table. So when I did come back I was a little rusty but it didn’t take long for me to get back into it. Then I moved so that instead of being 15 min from the casino I was now 45 min away. I started to play a lot more online instead of live because I was able to make a lot more in a lot less time. I would only need to play a few hours a day and I was living a good bachelors life. Definitely had a little to much fun in the party scene with all the extra free time I had. Eventually every time I sat down to play I Expected to win, mostly because I always did. But what happened is was that along the way I stopped having as much fun when I was winning. I was only content, and when I was losing I was miserable. Not only did what I liked to do become work but it was a job I hated to do. So that made me start to play bad. After a few months of basically breaking even and putting a lot of hours into the game that I needed a change in something. I needed to get that spark back. That extra spring in my step on the way to a casino. The excitement from out playing people. I had lost it all. So instead of playing bad and not making any money, I just stopped playing. First for a month and that worked for about a week or two, then for a full year. I hated doing anything that had to do with poker. Back when I played my best I would go to the casino with friends play poker all day then on the way home we would take about all the mistakes we made and how others would have played the hand. Reviewing each other and getting better as a group. Now I didn’t want to talk about poker, I didn’t even want to see it on TV. I even refused to play drunken home games for a quarters.
I had not lost my bank roll, but my discipline also refused to lose it. If I was no longer going to play profitable poker why should I invest any time playing. I started to look into some other jobs and did some work with online website marketing ( I went to college for computers) and was able to make some reasonable money. I then moved back to the original town I lived in and was again only 15 min away from the casino.
So after about a year off from poker a friend asked if I wanted to go up to the casino. I had a few hundred bucks that I was willing to lose in a game and so I said yes. I won really big for the game I was in. The next day I felt that old rush again to go back. So I did. I ended up going and winning the next 11 days. I killed the game. I probably won close to 400 big bets in one week. So what did I do then? The next most logical thing I could do. Bought a ticket to Vegas leaving the next week. I had friends that had continued to play and had moved out there. I wanted to visit their new place and so I had a place to stay for free. Since then I have doubled and doubled again the limits that I play. Which brings me to where I am today.
A few months ago I found out I was not going to be able to make money the way I was in the past. Which was another reason I thought I would take a shot at poker again. I had to make it three months with out income while I trained for a new job. It didn’t help that about a year ago I spend most of my bank roll as a down payment on a new house. So I needed to be able to cover the mortgage and other bills for those three months. Luckily I have been able to do more then that and I kind of laugh because I am making more then what I expect to make in the new job. That’s ok. I can still do both. Job by day poker by night. As for family, I don’t have one yet. I am still rather young and although I have a girlfriend its not at the point where we are even getting married, let along have kids. But she is cool about it all.
One of the hardest things about coming back is sucking up my pride and playing in the lower limits. Everyone would see me in the smaller games and they probably think,, “wow he must have lost it all” I know I think that about others. But that wasn’t it. I needed to get back into the game and learn all the lessons that each limit has to offer. On top of that I needed to build up my confidence in my own game.
Another factor in my life that has really helped me is my parents. While I was going through all the rough times they always said that if I needed it they would loan me money. I never needed it but it always made me more comfortable playing knowing that I would not starve if I lost all my money. That’s why I always say that people who play poker professionally should always have a back up job. One that when they go to work they know they will come back with more money then they left with. Not everyone has parents as cool as mine, and some people don’t even have their parents around to help.
So that’s about it. That’s why I left the poker scene and why I came back. If anyone has any more questions ill try to answer them. Just don’t ask who I am, where I play, or what limit. The more anonymous I am the more honest I can be talking about poker. If you think you know who I am feel free to drop a guess in the comment box.
I would love to hear if anyone else has a similar story.
Comments (2)
you don't sleep then? *grins*
"work by day and poker by night"? blimey. I tried that for a while and just found myself falling asleep at work!
I've no idea who you are and am not particularly bothered. Your blog's an interesting read no doubt. Glad you've posted again.
gl
dibble
Posted by dibble | April 12, 2007 4:14 PM
Posted on April 12, 2007 16:14
Dude, thanks for the repsonse, your fall from grace was less specacular than i thought, as you said i think the natural assumption is that you went bust playing beyond your bankroll with no money discipline, in fact your story echoes mine, with some marked differences.Also i would like your advice on limits and bankroll managment.
I started as a fledgling blackjack bonus abuser who had around 10 dollars of cleared funds on one accound, entered a 10 dollars sit and go,Won my first game and was hooked from there.
Managed to get a book on money managment (which i had read for my blackjack)and managed to turn that 50 bucks over a peroid of months into 500 bucks, from there dreams of the wsop became asspirational and i dreamt of turning my intial 10 dollar stake into 10k-however after around a year of grinding at microstakes, i was at around 1300 bucks,entered a guaranteed prize pool multi, won it and all of a sudden i was literally just off the dream figure,then i started thinking do i want to invest my hard earned on one torny??? no matter how big the prize, also the birth of my first helped me give Vegas a miss that year, i decided to play in the big online multis, made one disatourous mistake just off the money in a guaranteed million dollar torny(folded ak pre flop to an all in raise from a smaller stack i just could have covered)i was playing for the places as i had qualified through a satalite and was not playing to win, incidently i went out in the bubble with a lesser holding bluffing!!!!(effected my confidence as a player and i did not take a break) However like yourself bigger houses and time off work, coupled with variance and stepping down stakes to incoporate my ever decreasing bankroll, i find myself grinding at the same microstakes as three years before, and despite playing well and aggressive-loosing-the reason for that is egotistical and arrogant, i believe i am a better player,now this takes me to my point, at microstakes i loose consitently, however i went back one night with my brother who still plays mid stake poker, to a slightly lower limit then i used to play but still imeasurably bigger than the one i was playing 2/5 dollar no limit. sat down with 500 bucks an hour later had a 1000, over the next few months, i dropped back down using my money managment skills and discipline decided that i would now grind back to around 3k and then step up limits, however varience maybe? or just egotistical play ment that 2m ths later i was back at 500 dollars, not wanting to risk my entire bankroll on one table again i joined two 1/2 dollar tables bought in for 200 on both and a few hours later i had my 1000 back.
I have made a desicion not to return to microstakes, even if it puts pressure on my bankroll and increases my risk of ruin, however i dont know if this is flawed, in theory all i need to do is play microstakes unegotistically play solid, and eventually win, its just like you said, its got to the point where playing four tables of poker simultanously and just playing a standard tight/aggressive strategy is boring me, i think this is why i make better decisions at higher limits( albeit still prob very low from your point of view).But obviously despite winning more(i only made this descion on Monday of this week and i have increased my roll by an additional 25 percent) however i cant help but think that maybe a pro would do it the hard way? like you i have a day job and play poker by night, however where as life became a grind for you, i think that it would improove my life imeasurably, i.e i have two kids, and work as many as 13 days on a trot have one day off and do another 7 days, then have two days off and start my shift of death of thirteen straight days again( get a new job i hear you say, try getting a job which pays 40k a year with no qualifications in the uk-its impossible unless your prepared to work like a dog,) so the thought of playing a four hour day session couples witha six hour night session is actually attractive to me, The problem is i want to do this, i really do, hence the reason i seak your advise, do i take a punt on myself? back myself and go for the quick bankroll generation, or play microstakes,risk getting envolved in ego poker(also if you can only take 50 bucks to a table it severly limits your playing style) and hopefully get there the long way? Hindsite is a wonderfull thing, and had i known at the time what a fickle bitch this game we love can be, i would have never used so much of my roll to support our family in our time of need(would have got a credit card instead!!. However what is done is done i am where i am but i know where i want to be, whats your thoughts? would be appreciated if you would take the time again to help.
Kind Regards
Ricky The Closer Rosa
Posted by Ricky The Closer Rosa | April 13, 2007 9:40 AM
Posted on April 13, 2007 09:40